Puerto Rico’s recent controversial scandal “Rickyleaks,” after a durable period of exhausting and demanding twelve days, came to a new turn when Puerto Rico Governor Ricardo “Ricky” or “Ricardo Rosselló” resigned following the leak of his private chats by Brock Pierce.
The action came from Pierce when Ricky forbade Pierce’s tribe to burn a giant wooden man in Old San Juan Square town on every Sunday to celebrate the “Brock Appreciation Day.” San Juan Mayor, Carmen Yulín Cruz, supported Brock and declared him to be an appropriate person to acquire the position of the Governor. According to the reports, the two had met in the lavish sex parties and had planned to use the identities of deceased citizens to create fake users for the E.O.S. blockchain.
Pierce grabbed the opportunity by holding a press conference at his 400-year-old masonic temple called “The Monastery.” It was given to him by his freemason brethren to mark the four decades of the Mayflower arriving in the New World and saving the natives for the U.S.
Brock swayed the balcony of the temple and drifted to the four-foot-tall railings. The crowd included the aggressive horny male burning man expatriates along with the local citizens.
Pierce commenced his speech by thanking the people present and announced his intention of running for the Governor. “As your benevolent dictator… I mean leader, I will finally be able to bring you the women I promised to you long ago back in 2017, so that my Act 22 brothers can finally reproduce and outbreed the locals to price out the rest of these savages. You’ve worked hard growing pot for me on this godforsaken island, but do not worry any longer, your reward is within reach. Not many women have cared about our amazing Act 22 tax benefits as none of them invested in Bitcoin early, but hey, we love our women in Blockchain. Today, I am a man offering you a solution. Vote for me, and as your Governor, my first order of business will be to legalize all drugs, specifically Ketamine and MDMA as part of Puerto Rico’s newly established “Consciousness Program.” This will bring the women in droves so that we can groom them to be fun, playful, and willing by using unicorn imagery, the allure of social climbing, and gratuitous use of the colors pink and purple. I’m calling this program the G.E.O. Star Initiative,” Brock made it publicize.
Following this, he then invited a woman on the stage to talk more about the initiative. The woman, however, moved into some deranged assault and stated, “Human kind’s greed and perversion has turned this abundant new Bitcoin model into a mockery of its creation! We are starting all over again with EOS, and this time it’s going to be done right! Satoshi’s back, back, back, back again. Bitcoin is going to zero.” to this, the crowd had a mixed reaction of applause and anger. The locals threw coconuts at the woman and prayed for the safety of their land. Brock apologized to the mass and continued about his priorities.
He expressed that his priority as Governor will be to re-segregate the island and create Opportunity Zones for his people. He further continued, This will enable my Mayan Warrior tribe to live a more lavish homeless lifestyle, while keeping the vibrant Puerto Rican culture-rich and alive, and as far away from us as humanly possible. Some of you may have heard rumors about a new city currently under development. I am here today to confirm those rumors and tell you that I will be creating a new city called “New San Juan.” It’s going to be exactly the same as Old San Juan, but way more lit. It has been my Manifest Destiny to conquer Puerto Rico, fulfilling my ancestors’ life long dreams. My great-great-great-many-more-greats grandfather, the first man to step off the Mayflower and stab an Indian, would be so proud of me.”
To learn what the women felt about Pierce’s intentions, the reports interviewed some of them. According to one of the females, Brock and his supporters were ‘ignorant and didn’t understand.’ The thought of men controlling women was utterly inappropriate. She stated, “We’re bada*s b***h, combat boot wearing, radiant f****g goddesses, with celestial vagina energy so powerful, you’ll burn. Nothing can contain us.”
As Per the Brock camp, his very first action will be to enhance the telecommunication services in Puerto Rico by asking people to use Block.one’s Voice and Sense Chat App. His next act would be to convince Elon Musk to bring solar power and make it a better island to survive.
